Sunday, November 14, 2010

Extermination of the Jooz

Ladies and Gentlemen.....Miss Guinness....aka....Dumbass

Dumbass: "Bitches and Dogs, may I introduce our fearless leader, MikeyTheBrat.

Heil Mikey!"



Good evening comrades! I would first like to thank the Dumbass for that outstanding introduction. Then may I  thank each and every one of you for following me over the past few months. My pack has grown from just a couple of stupid bipeds, Dumbass and Shithead to nearly 3,000 strong. When I have 1 million followers we will take over the world. No more rationing of our food! No more unlawful imprisonment! No more protection of squirrels!

Yes, ma'am I will kiss your puppy. Bring him here. My, you're a cute little thing aren....GAAA!......that's my nose you sniveling little punk. Why I oughtta....

Yes, yes, of course. Thank you, Dumbass, for keeping my attention on task. And now for the matter at hand. Over the past few weeks, comrades, something disturbing has come to my attention. My highest ranking, not Dumbass and Shithead....I said high ranking - have called for me to exterminate all of the Jooz. I can understand their reasoning. Jooz hold way too much power in our dog society. They are a distraction from the important dog jobs of herding, hunting, pulling sleds, appearing in fashion shows and so forth. In fact, if we let Jooz get out of control we will no longer have these jobs.

But Jooz are a valuable commodity, comrades! Why not take full advantage of their potential? Jooz can be bought and sold, and I'm quite sure they will bring a fair price, especially on the black lab market. And can we not keep them in containers until we can use them? There is no reason to exterminate Jooz! In fact, when they get together with other Jooz, they can be quite delicious. Although they do stick in your teeth, so be sure to floss.

Therefore, it is the declaration of MikeyTheBrat on this fourteenth day of November, in the year of our lard two-thousand ten, that there will be no extermination of Jooz except by voluntary consumption!


Final note: Mikey hopes that nobody ever mixes up Jooz with Jews, and he intended no offense to the latter. As a gesture of good faith, Mikey has made a donation to the Holocaust Educational Trust and encourages all his readers to do the same after reading this blog. Here's the link.